Well, life is like this: you start collaborating in a newspaper, the country is called Costa Rica, you knew nothing or little about it, you read, watch videos, listen to people, you see that they are super nice and, suddenly… You become obsessed completely!
And do not tell me why you don’t want to know Costa Rica, but that you are already so embarrassed that you even want to be Costa Rican. And even if you were born in Santiago de Compostela (Spain and Galicia), it is easier for you to say that you are from Santiago de Costa Rica; that is, “Total Paranoia II”, available in the best movie theaters.
My decerebration has reached such an extent that now the Spanish passport no longer seems so pretty to me. And with this passport thing, which is an international issue… Well, that is it, you start with “it is not so pretty”.
Then you continue with “it is a bit ugly”, you move on to “it is horrible” and you end with “the one that is beautiful is the one from Costa Rica, which is blue” and, without realizing it, from there to become a Tico, there is only one step. Yes, I know… It is a total obsession: I even say “mae”. Yes, I recognize that it is an obsession, although I am already beginning to doubt if it is a matter of mental illness; I am not sure about it…
Look, I used to walk calmly to the beach and when I got closer to the coast I would say: “How beautiful, how marvelous!! Not now; now I see the coast and what I see in my mind is Costa Rica, and me on its paradisiacal beaches drinking coconuts, drinking a couple of guaros, eggnogs or liters of chiliguaro shots. And by giving wind to so much isotonic drink ‘made in China’, it will kill us.
And everything is so. They invite me to eat at a restaurant; they ask me if the food was good, and if before I said “delicious”, now I do not just say “rico”. If not, “Costa Rica” comes out to me, all in a row and without stammering, as is normal; But if I even say “mae”…!!
Everything is so cool!
As I told you, a total madness, but even in the field of personal relationships. Before, when they introduced me to a person from Central or South America and they told me that he was, for example, Peruvian or Colombian, I would shake their hands so happily.
Well, at least not now; now they tell me that he is Peruvian or Bolivian and the first thing I think is “wow, this fool, if he were from Costa Rica…” and then I shake his hand with reluctance, disinterest, existential apathy…
My mental lack of control reaches such an extent that when I hear someone with an accent different from mine I say as if they were a small child: Are you from Costa Rica!!!? Are you from Costa Rica!! !? Are you from Costa Rica!!!?
And when they tell me no, that he is from Barcelona or Madrid… Then it is a total disappointment, why did I ask? And now even my friends are worried, because many times they ask me if something is wrong with me and I simply answer: “No, nothing is wrong; everything is tuanis (so cool)”.
