Family life and children can help you be happy and can also bring you truly pleasant moments. For some time there has been a certain trend among young people (and not so young) who say they do not want to have children. I think the reasons could be summarized as follows: 1) I want to live my life 2) I do not want to bring a child into this world to suffer 3) Having children is very expensive.
Some person will say that they do not like children, but this is a very unusual position, but it is not original either because historically there have always been people who think like this. I think that the decision not to have children has nothing to do with the children themselves, but with the type of current relationship. Until a century or so ago, children represented wealth in the home, not only because of the joy they brought and the sources of love and dedication they generated, but also because, when they grew up, they represented an additional help in maintaining the family house.
For the farmer or the rancher or the small businessman (which was almost all of them) the son represented an additional work force that cooperated in obtaining the necessary goods for the sustenance of the family. His good upbringing was a good investment for the future, at least until he became independent and made his own life. Also, there was always the hope of a son who had better skills and opportunities than his parents. In addition, it was certain that children enriched society with new useful members and that is why it was practically considered a family and social duty to have children.
Today those ideas have changed, at least among the middle class. For some decades, children have not been a direct investment, because their main job is to train professionally to aspire to a job that allows them to earn a living. Few of them work for the family business, increasing income. In addition, procreation is no longer erroneously considered a family or social duty. I say wrongly because no society that decimates its population has the opportunity to grow socially and economically. New members always enrich the society and the family.
But the true reason why people do not want to have children today is because of a false idea that children prevent their own personal fulfillment, or the free and pleasant enjoyment of life. I cannot argue with that, but I will simply say that I do not agree with that position. Our personal success lies precisely in the delivery: we are all happy to correctly deliver the services for which we have prepared ourselves; that is, correctly performing a task that someone else needs and is grateful for. You know, happiness is in service and delivery to anyone.
Something else is pleasant. I take pleasure in a good meal, the morning sun hitting my face, a good bout of exercise that I enjoy a good meal or a good wine. This is pleasant. But it is more pleasant when we can share it. I do not conceive that someone enjoys all these things if they do not have someone to share their life with and the more they share, the more pleasant it is.
In any case, true happiness lies in dedication to the other because what really satisfies us is empathy, the feeling we get when the other is satisfied with our work: a favor, a professional service, the correct performance of a task, etc. The best stimulus for life and to be happy is to know that he loves you and that he is waiting for you; there is someone who counts on you and who appreciates it.
Children and family represent the first and most effective opportunity to learn to be happy living together and serving. There is nothing comparable to the affectionate kiss that a son gives you when she goes to sleep or when he shows that face of happiness and satisfaction at sharing an afternoon of sports or adventures with you. The day changed and life has another perspective.
Children do not expect a world without problems or difficulties; that is, they do not expect a world without shortages or challenges. Children do expect a family and, above all, parents who love them. Honestly speaking, feeling that love and that dedication can solve any adversity.
It is worth taking on the challenge!
