Are you sick of having to say no? 33% of women admit that, sometimes, they have been so worn out that they have preferred to go directly to sleep than having sex.

So your partner is doing that delicious caress on your neck, which always turns on the southern part of your body? But today, your temperature has hardly risen a degree and, on few seconds, you have thought you have not experienced that impulse for sex in a long time?

Couple giving caresses each other

Before you get scared and think that the lack of your sexual desire means that your relationship is about to go down the drain, or that your sexual machinery is out of order, stop for a minute. Most times, a common behavior is to blame yourself -something that you do almost automatically- though it does not seem to have a connection with your libido.

Dedicated on weekends to sleep

If you have Saturdays and Sundays to catch up on sleep, your sexual desire will go downhill. An erratic sleep schedule will increase insomnia during weekdays because it is difficult for your body to know when to disconnect, especially when going to bed at 11 pm and the other day at 3 pm. Insomnia, in turn, reduces the level of testosterone, which is associated with a lower libido.

That is a vicious circle. The lack of sleep also increases the production of cortisol, the stress hormone that further reduces testosterone. Maybe your weekend revelry will be affected but, for the sake of your sex life, try to establish a consistent sleep pattern of getting up early on weekends even if you go to bed late the night before. You will sleep better and relax more. Doing that will maintain normal levels of cortisol and testosterone in both men and women.

Do not complain about your body

Making continuous references to your huge butt, or examining your belly bulge in the front of the mirror with a frown, does not exactly insinuate desire to undress in bed with your partner. Stop thinking like that and look at things from his perspective. Remember that your supposed imperfections have never stopped him from being attracted to you, or that he loves every second you spend naked with him. Men can be demanding when they watch women’s bodies on TV but the truth is that, in real life, great sex has nothing to do with a perfect body.

At the first sign of insecurity during sex, relax your thoughts and concentrate on how sensual your body feels and how much your partner likes it. Listen to your own breathing, feel how your bodies complement each other by keeping you focused on the physical aspect. It will put you in a more passionate state of mind.

DO NOT WATCH THE NEWS before going to bed

Stress and sex do not combine! But even if you are aware of the things that cause stress to you, particularly an unpleasant statement from your boss or a huge expense on your credit card, you may not realize that the local and world events also make you feel stressed.

End the day by listening to news about probable economic or political crimes, and even natural disasters prevent you from relaxing your mind at the moment you go to bed. Not only do these themes stay in your head, but also have a physiological effect on how seductive you can feel.

If you are stressed, your body pumps more cortisol into the bloodstream, lowering testosterone levels. Do not watch the news before going to bed! Instead, use sensual methods that prepare you to go to bed. It is much better to share a warm and creamy dessert, take a hot shower that relaxes your body, and read a page of an erotic novel.

Enjoying those intimate moments

A glass of wine only, no more than that!

A couple of drinks may take away inhibitions, but if you routinely go for more cups within a few hours, you will not be ready for sexual activity. As alcohol dehydrates, it harms the lubrication and slows the time of your sexual responses which, at the same time, makes it difficult to reach orgasm.