Firstly, let’s look at what a myth really is. Often a widely held but false belief or idea, myths consist of narratives or stories that play a fundamental role in society. Tied up in tradition and legendary story telling myths come without a determinable basis of fact.

Basically fancy lies, sugar coated, waist coated legendary fairy tales. Yet, we allow so many of these to dictate our beliefs.

Let’s take a look at the ones that are creating havoc each and every day in our so called modern society. We will start with the big one that religion and scared parents refuse to let go of.

Myth #1: Virginity

Virginity is not a state of being, yet it has been falsely created around the hymen myth. Being pregnant is a state. A woman is either pregnant or she is not.

Being a virgin or not a virgin is impossible. This perceived “state of a woman” dangerously leads to her being a commodity to be upheld, controlled, sold, ridiculed, and killed over.

The narrative that a woman’s virginity is protected by a “freshness seal”, a “purity seal” is akin to the concept of a rabbit in a waist coat delivering chocolate eggs that never break or melt throughout the land all in one evening!

Da Dah!!!

Easter Bunny and the hymen have a lot in common.

Designed to act as a seal of a woman’s purity for financial gain, we need not only to look towards what we consider as repressed societies for its damaging effects on the female psyche.

In countries such as Norway, many doctors are financially gaining from women being pressured to have their “hymen resewn” and as you will learn, that is basically impossible. It is a money making and guilt driven value scheme.

There is no such thing as a virginity test. The state of a woman’s vagina does not “change” in any physical way from the moment before she experiences penetration from a penis, dildo or fingers to after the fact that she does.

The medical world has known -since 1906- that the hymen is a fringe of mucus membrane tissue just on the outside of the vaginal opening that can look like a scrunchy tissue around the opening or a half moon. It can be thin and flexible, or thicker and more durable.

The Hymen does not break

Hymens or the “Corona Crown”, as a group of female doctors in Europe are now calling it, meaning ‘halo of tissue’, allow period blood to leave the vagina whilst allowing pleasure giving objects and appendages to enter.

You would be forgiven (for now) if you thought that somehow the hymen “popped”’ the first time a girl had sex. And this belief is causing women all over the world to ‘”re-instate” their hymens before marriage.

Can we get a global surge on men “re-instating” their foreskins? Please? (More on that in a following article)

Surgery is needed for women ONLY if they have an Imperforate or Septate hymen. These 2 types of Hymens are rare and occur in 0.05% of women. The surgical procedure is performed to remove it, not to re-instate it!

And yes; some women do bleed the first time they engage in sexual intercourse with someone with a penis. This is due to mainly they are entered too early. Intercourse generally occurs with in the first 10 minutes of initial stimulation whilst a woman’s vagina takes up to 30 to 45 minutes to be ready for actual penetration.

Depending on its elasticity and time of arousal, a woman’s hymen may be the cause of pain or pleasure during intercourse

A woman -or girl- that bleeds and experiences pain during her first penetrative sexual encounter is experiencing this not due to her hymen breaking but due to lack of education around her body, lack of patience, and the sense of urgency from the male counterpart.

If you are wanting to know more about ‘The virginity Fraud’ then check out this TEDx Talk in Oslo, presented by Nina Dølvik Brochmann & Ellen Støkken Dahl .

Myth #2: Stranger Danger

As Wikipedia states this phrase is intended to encapsulate the danger associated with adults whom children do not know. The main threat with which stranger danger campaigns are concerned is child sexual abuse. The urban myth is that most child sexual abusers find their victims by frequenting such places as schoolyards and playgrounds.

So let’s look at some facts about sexual assault that blows this myth out of the water and out of the school playground, as most child sexual abusers offend against children whom they know and with whom they have established a relationship.

Over 90% of child victims know their offender, with almost half of the offenders being a family member. Of sexual assaults against people age 12 and over, approximately 80% of the victims know the offender

Contrary to the elitist view that perpetuates racism often portrayed in the cinema directed at the single white female, most sexual assaults are committed by someone of the same race as the victim. An exception to this is that people who commit sexual assault against Native Americans are usually not Native American (American Indians and Crime, 1999).

In the majority of cases, abusers gain access to their victims through deception and enticement, seldom using force. Abuse typically occurs within a long-term, ongoing relationship between the offender and victim and escalates over time.

Myth #3: Men Love Sex More than Women

Woman love sex as much as men do… so just get over it!

Many will be surprised to know that WOMEN LOVE SEX even more than men…

The age old belief that men love sex whilst women crave chocolate instead is a truck load of rubbish. In fact, women need sex more than men!

Why?

A woman actually requires positive feedback from her partner in order to increase the serotonergic pathways in her brain that sets off the increase of her dopamine levels. That saying “use it or lose it” comes to play here.

A woman without positive reinforcement from her environment experiences a drop in serotonin levels that lead to a drop in her dopamine. With a drop in dopamine her cortisol levels rise as her stress response increases. With this rise of cortisol she is far more susceptible to headaches, migraines, autoimmune disorders, leaky gut, and sleep disorders.

But if a woman feels nourished, loved, and cared for she is going to “chase that sex like the animal that she is”  because she wants to get that serotonergic burst in her brain, and she’s going to be motivated to be the best partner.

Keep your woman happy. You know what they say: “Happy Wife, Happy Life!”

Myth #4: The Vagina

One of the most misused words in the English language, we are well known to use the word Vagina to describe and refer to what is actually the vulva.

Vaginal area

Vagina in ancient Greek means “sheath” and describes the internal canal of the female anatomy. Extending anywhere between from 9.5 and 12.5 centimeters the vagina includes the area from the opening all the way to the cervix and houses many pleasure giving erogenous zones.

The ‘A spot’, the ‘K spot’, ‘The Sacred Area’, the ‘P spot’, or the ‘U spot?

A self-cleaning organ (please, never use soap or a douche to clean her; this can throw off your pH balance, leading to an infection), a vagina can expand to 200% of her normal size when aroused. Isn’t that just incredible? I think so.

And before you go into a wee panic, it is impossible to lose something inside of your vagina since it is a fixed shallow canal. Even a Jade Egg that seemingly has gone missing during fast and furious sexual intercourse will always be found!

Don’t know what all these are? Book a session with me and I will explain them all and how to find them! I promise you.

Intrigued by what you have read?  Then show me some love and follow me on Instagram. Until next time, I will find a way to add a little more pleasure to your day.

Always with Pleasure…

Melissa Louise

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