To think that love is always renewed and transformed is a romantic and beautiful vision, but it is not real for many and less when a person does not deserve that sincere affection.
Yes, falling in love with someone is relatively easy, of course! But if we see it from the perspective, falling out of love when the relationship ends, it is not so much.
Although it sounds crude, stop feeling love for someone can even be good for your health. It is, clearly, in those cases in which there is a toxic couple relationship in which abuse, physical and verbal violence are common, but also in those where there is unrequited love.
The point is that the course of our thoughts does not always go in the direction we want or that it does not bring us greater well-being. Much of this is because those memories, ideas, and images that come under the focus of our consciousness tend to escape our control.
We can decide more or less on what details or aspects to focus our attention, but the topics that occupy our minds are not usually chosen by us. Or, rather, we choose to call certain memories and analyze them, but we do not have the full power to make them go away, and we cannot prevent them from occasionally assaulting us by surprise: that is part of the normal functioning of our brain.
However, that this is normal, does not mean that, under certain circumstances, this phenomenon of memories that come to mind cannot turn into real headaches; especially, if those memories have to do with past relationships, love disappointments, and broken hearts.
So how do you get involved? Saying that we want to fall out of love is easier than doing so, but that does not mean that it is impossible to make this type of feeling weaken in favor of our well-being and personal autonomy.
If what you want is to fall out of love, we recommend that you follow these steps:
- Cut off physical and visual contact at the roots.
Having contact with the person in question causes the production of oxytocin, a hormone related to affection. If you avoid having contact “live and direct” with the person, this will help your desires to decrease considerably, and help you get the person out of your heart and out of your head. This is the first step to “detoxify” yourself from that love that now torments your life.
- Rebuild your life through routines that make you independent.
Many people, when starting a relationship, make their life revolve solely and exclusively around their partner, thus distancing themselves from friends and family. Serious problem since you are closing your world. It`s time to rebuild those abandoned meaningful relationships.
- Don’t try running away from the pain
Surely in these moments you may feel broken and everything makes you cry. Don’t run away from the pain, cry all you want, don’t hold back. You will see that after that emotional catharsis, it will be easier for you to overcome the breakup